A preteen boy with Goodness and Moral Righteousness constantly on his mind. Although Orel doggedly applies the rules to being a good Christian every second of the day, his penchant for taking things too literally often gets him into trouble. But please remember: as mischievous as Orel seems, he only wants to do good.

Favorite pastime: Going to church.
Best friend: Jesus.
Next Best friend: Doughy.
Talent: Misinterpreting the lessons of Moralton's authority figures.

Orel's father rules the home with a stern, yet "fair" hand. Fair as long as they coincide conveniently with his method of child-rearing, i.e. the nostalgic, post-WWII, American way.

Favorite pastime: (tie) corporal punishment and drinking.
Talent: Engaging his wife in shallow, cordial conversations.
Favorite food: high balls.

Orel's overly-hardworking mother who will only take the easy way out when it comes to raising her children. You see, her obsession with homemaking makes her a somewhat neglectful maternal presence.

Favorite pastime: Cleaning.
Turn off: Sex with Clay.
Turn on: Refusing sex with Clay.

Orel's little brother obviously has issues. His only means of
communication is throwing fits and being a brat. Too much maternal attention early in life and not enough here in the present have made Shapey an emotional basket-case.

Favorite pastime: Yelling.
Least favorite pastime: Being weaned.
Hobby: Shouting.
Favorite food: Breast milk.
Talent: Screaming.

Chubby and malleable, Doughy is the best unwilling partner Orel can ask for. Especially when it comes to doing "God's work" Orel's way.

Talent: Nervousness.
Favorite Pastime: Not partaking in Orel's get-righteous-quick schemes (never happens).

A prematurely bald virgin, this spiritual leader of Moralton tends to let his sermons get a tad personal. All too often hostility towards his "boss" will sneak through the weekly teachings and put a spotlight on the Good Reverend's mortal fears and insecurities.

Favorite pastime: Not happy enough to have a favorite anything.
Most eaten food: "Lonely Man" frozen TV dinners; particularly soft steak in thick, brown water.
His biggest fan: Orel.

The head librarian at The Thomas Bowdler Public Library, this woman is a genius when it comes to being offended. Pick a movie, any movie; and Frances Christina Censordoll will rattle off reason after reason as to why the film is morally reprehensible and should be banned from the Moralton Cinema.

Favorite pastime: Picketing anywhere.
Favorite food: Eggs; under-fried or pickled.
Favorite movie: Has never seen one and never will.

Orel's grade school teacher is the ultimate historical revisionist. America can do no wrong and almost any other country is backwards. She is also mistrusting of young boys and their hormones.

Favorite pastime: Leaving work.
Least favorite pastime: Teaching.

Sexually ambiguous and downright creepy, this guy is a real enigma. If anyone out there has any insights on Coach Stopframe, please drop us a line. Frankly, we're at a loss.